Self Awareness is the Key...
You can't be in control of any thing else, if you aren't in control of yourself. And to make that happen, you must be self aware. If you leave it to chance for people to label you, you are in a lost battle already.
Introspection is the most important element to know self. Either you do it yourself, or you may take professional help from a coach who can help you realise and reflect you on yourself.
There are many dimensions to self awareness. Unless you know what are your limiting beliefs, your thinking style, personality, communication style, leadership style and what biases are playing on you, it will be a nightmare to really manage the outcome of your actions as you wouldn't know whether you are playing the game or the game is playing with you
Self-awareness is a key to really move forward in the right direction. If you know that you are not too strong physically and you want to get into a wrestling match with a wrestler, you are bound to lose because you chose the wrong sport. If you know that you are not too agile and you want to go and win an Olympic medal in badminton that is not going to happen. However, if you are aware that you can concentrate well hold your breath, can aim correctly then you can probably get into shooting and really win some laurels. So, it's very important for you to understand your own self. Do you know how you think, what are your beliefs, what stops you from doing something great or becoming something great, what is it that is holding you back, who are the right people in your life whom you want to drop and whom you want to keep so all these factors play a great role in in really transforming you as a wonderful individual and a human being and a professional
I am listing down the most effective 3 ways to be more self-aware,
1. Introspect : You need quietly and patiently introspect your thoughts, views, opinions which lead to certain actions you take. And as we know actions have equal and opposite reactions as per Newton's 3rd law, here we simply call it as consequences. Therefore, if you understand, what within you leads to certain actions, you will certainly have greater control on the outcome or consequences. My mother used to say if you don't have anyone to talk to, talk to the walls they will guide you. So, in literal meaning its looking inwards and knowing where you are heading to.
2. Retrospect: Now, here we dwell down the past. We end up doing a long of things, many times with research and many times while being impulsive. And, we understand actions will have reactions and consequences which might be in our favour, might be against us. So, what do we do? Here, we must sit with a thermos full of tea or coffee on a Sunday morning in your balcony or garden and just close your eyes, restart your virtual journey of the year or month and assess what you thought was best at that time and what was the real best thing to do? In simple words, peep in to past to better your future
3. Feedback: Last but not the least, seek help from your near and dear ones, a mentor or a professional coach who can help you invoke right set of memories and thoughts basis your experience and help sort them in a way that it becomes a story for you to understand yourself better. Prefer someone whom you can trust or someone who you know is neutral, low on bias quotient.