How to Dump your EGO & grow SELF-ESTEEM
Sages from ages have been telling the same thing, that dump your ego, it is going to burn you out. Historically it has been proven that EGO is a destroyer. You take example of any dictator, for a short while they become successful in their own sphere, but they lose on all the respect. Slowly, they are being hated and people want to get rid of them. Once these egoistic dictators are out or no more, no one remembers them except some historic books or articles telling, how one should not be.
I am a fan of principles as principles don’t change. If an apple must fall due to gravity, it will fall only and no way it is going to go up due to gravity.
When it comes to corporate life, professional life, it is no different. Talk about any work place, it is made up of individuals but individuals can only survive if they gel well, if they work together in collaborative mode and not in isolation. One doesn’t only talk work in office, there is a lot of socialisation, learning from each other happens. This may happen over a cup of coffee or in the lift or in a meeting room etc.
The factors, which catalyses this process of getting together is the ability to listen, understand, acknowledge, guide and support each other.
You miss on above factors and think about only your views, is surely not going to go well with others in the room. Does this mean, suppress our thoughts or be submissive? NO WAY. This is even worse situation to be in. Rather, one needs to learn the art of acknowledging others but at the same time voicing your opinion with full conviction. Here, it becomes a question of standing for yourself, for your self-esteem.
A lot of times people end up mistaking ASSERTIVENESS as ARROGANCE. Based on my observation and dealings with scores of people, I strongly believe, there is only one situation when this can happen. When the conversations start with “I” rather than “YOU”
Few rules to show you stand for your opinions but with no EGO:
“ACKNOWLEDGE” what other person is saying before pushing your own thought or opinion. You might be a good speaker, but the other person might be an introvert. So, give full opportunity for him to speak first.
“FACT” based counter or support to an argument is a big lever to pull up a good decisive conversation
“DECISION” focus in your mind will automatically help you to device your conversation or discussion in acceptable decision direction
“SHARE RESPONSIBILITY – TAKE ACCOUNTABILITY” is the biggest factor to help you show your confidence and that you stand for your decisions while encapsulating a collective responsibility structure in your team or group
I believe these few rules, help an individual to satisfy their EGO so that it doesn’t become a beast and at the same time, this helps the objectives to be achieved without letting your self-esteem down.
Hope you got some thought stimulus from this short read !!!